*Wrote this a few weeks ago, but just now getting around to posting it.. Thank you Easter break :)*
I sit up straight and strain to see through man-made lenses.
“R…O…Z…T” I read letters and more letters as lenses swipe in and out and my mind dizzies as I try to guess which is blurry and which is less blurry.
“So you’ve been coming here a long time.” My file beginning with a little nine year old girl with pink-rimmed glasses and messy brown hair.
“Yes.” It seems I am prone to bad eyesight…
Years of seeking to improve my often worsening vision. Suddenly I remember the “smart girl” wearing a strong perscription framed in pink but her eyes never looking up to see where she is going. With eyes glued to the sink never daring to make eye contact with the girl in the mirror. It seems a hindrance to clear sight can sometimes be none other than ourselves.
I remove my glasses and the room becomes a blur. How do you as a new creation deal with a less-than-perfect past? When you write and write and write and realize that experience taints the perfect story you wish you could tell but realize that the perfect story is not who you are.
Jesus never threw a stone. The imperfect crowds dropped theirs and left. But it seems sometimes we stone ourselves.
A vision check up. I could use one of those.
“Where there is no vision, the people perish.” -Proverbs 29:18
I have been blind for a long time.
The begger sitting by the road as Jesus passed by cried out and Jesus gave him what? Sight. So that a future could then unfold. A life of nothing becoming a life of something–and that something displaying one of the most wonderful miracles of all. I am not the perfect story. But rather a messy story of grace. And I. Am. Learning. To. Like. It.
I am learning to like the messy. Nine year old messy brown haired girl now twenty-two year old clothed in His redemptive and undeserved grace.
I put my new contact lenses in. Daily. As I keep walking away from the days of broken mirrors and heart tainted with hatred. Clarity finally comes when we let go of all that clogs our hearts and cling to the One who cleanses us of our self-hatred and self-rejection. He giving new eyes to see beauty in what was broken and that vision Must. Be. Kept. Healthy. Free from worries, doubts, insecurities, fears, regret. So that a thriving enviornment of life and growth may be cultivated in what was once dead and…blind.
So with other little messy haired girls now dropping our stones and lifting once-blind-now-hopeful eyes,
May we finally begin to truly see.
“For the vision is yet for the appointed time; it hastens toward the goal and it will not fail. Though it tarries, wait for it; for it will certainly come, it will not delay.” -Habakkuk 2:3